Would a band by any other name smell so sweet?

Band names. So much to think about with a band name.
It's a musical rite of passage to come up with your band name. I remember my high school boyfriend and his buddies spending hours trying to come up with a name for their band: something cool, trendy, unique, mysterious, easy to say, etc. Inspirations for band names come from a zillion places. Let me show you what I mean by listing some more popular bands and where their names came from:

Pearl Jam - Apparently, Eddie Vedder had a grandma named Pearl and she made some kind of fucked up jam. That's the story there.

Duran Duran - It's the name of the evil do-er played by Miles O'Shea in the movie "Barbarella". Except the name was spelled Durand Durand ( they took off the ending d's )

Steely Dan - Named after a dildo from William Burroughs book "Naked Lunch"

Marilyn Manson - A combination of hollywood glamour/models and serial killers. MARILYN Monroe & Charles MANSON. The members of the band also changed their names to follow suit, ie: Ginger Fish ( GINGER Rogers and Albert FISH ) Although it could be for Ginger from Gilligan's Island. I don't know for sure. Either would work.

Seriously, I could go on for days with examples. Movies, relatives, books, something you saw on the street, ex-girlfriends, hometowns, food. I don't know if I dare mention how the band Korn got their name ( it's pretty gross ). In a nutshell, it was a conversation they overheard. Something involving sex and feces. Oh please, don't make me say more...please....

A band name can make you and break you, in my opinion. If it's good - you are safe. If it's really stupid - you will be known as the band with the really stupid name. You could be an incredibly talented jazz band, but if you have a name that sounds somewhat childish and crass - those jazz critics might pass you by. If your band was created when you were 17 years old, odds are that same band name MIGHT not be appealing to you 6 years down the road. My example being the band INCUBUS. They started up when they were in high school. 15-17 years old. I can see how the term "incubus" might be intriguing and cool to a young horny teenage boy....

DEFINITION: INCUBUS - An evil spirit supposed to descend upon and have sexual intercourse with women as they sleep.

But they themselves will tell you ( 10 years later ) that they totally regret giving their band that name. As adult men, they realize that it might be seen as offensive to women and they are pretty embarrassed by it. Problem is, they've sold millions of albums with it. That's how they are known. Can't walk away now. But, they wish they could.

Some bands try a little too hard to come up with something hip and cool, biting into something so "NOW" ( or so "2 weeks ago" ) that they don't see how desperate and stupid it looks. My example? About 9 months after the movie 'Pulp Fiction' came out, I recall seeing a band name pop up in the club listings ( in a Boston paper ) and it made me cringe. The name? FIVE DOLLAR MILKSHAKE. Anybody that has seen 'Pulp Fiction' recalls the five dollar milkshake scene. Anybody that was breathing in the mid early 90's recalls how INSANE the publicity and hype was over that movie ( well deserved too, but.... ) and 9 months after the fact, I see it as tacky and weak to try to jump into their cool pool. And now ( if the band still exists, which I doubt ) it's almost laughable.

Certain genres of music always inspire names fitting to their sound.
If you heard the names PUNGENT STENCH, CANNIBAL CORPSE, or KILLDOZER - would you think gospel? Country? I think not. Nothing funnier than watching Headbanger's Ball and seeing the hardcore/metal band names these days. Usually they start with a preposition ( OF, AFTER, AGAINST, FOR ) and then it follows up with something involving death, anguish, pain, etc etc. But, the worst band names? The WORST? I hate ANY band name ( or tv show or movie ) that starts with an adverb or verb ending in 'ing', and ends with a girl's name. Usually it's a 2 word title, sometimes 3. Whether they get success or not - I fucking HATE it. Chasing Amy, Judging Amy, Suddenly Susan, Reaching Chloe, Running from Sheila, Blissfully Melissa, Achingly Margaret... whatever...STOP! STOP THE MADNESS! That trend must stop.

Then there are band names that make you go "Huh?"
Be it stupid or spelled weird ( adding y's instead of i's and z's instead of s's - think WYLD STALLYNZ from "Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure" ) or lengthy or cryptic - it leaves you scratching your head thinking "Where the hell did that come from?" Maybe that's what they were going for - and if so - it worked!

Anway...I could discuss this forever.
I'm quick to get pissy about a dumb band name.
I'm quick to cheer a really cool one.
And I've often thought "If I could be in a band, what would my band name be?" and well - the one name I've come up with is rather foul and I shouldn't repeat it. I guess I should go back to the drawing board with that.

Here's an mp3 that a friend of mine recently gave me. Due to my recent condition ( "with child" ) he obviously found this band name quite funny. The thing is, the song itself is really catchy in the weirdest way. Think minimal low-budget dork funk-pop. Made me groove a little. But the band name? Yeah, ya lost me....

I Hate You When You're Pregnant - Tanning Booth